Don't Worry About It.

Originally written on: April 29, 2011.

In your message you said,
you were goin' to bed,
but I'm not done with the night.
So I stayed up and read,
but your words in my head,
got me mixed up so I turned out the light.
 
And I, don't know how, to slow it down.
My mind's racing from chasing pirates.

Well the man in there swings
while the silliest things
floppin around in my brain. 
And I try not to dream
but them possible schemes
swim around, wanna drown me in synch.

And I, don't know how, to slow it down.
Oh my mind's racing from chasing pirates.
And I, don't know how, to slow it down.
Oh my mind's racing from chasing pirates.
My mind's racin' from chasing pirates...
-Chasing Pirates by Norah Jones.

Have you ever made yourself sick with worry?  Have you ever thought, if I don’t get this project done in a week I’m going to fail my assignment, then my class, then I’ll have an F.  And then I’ll fail every other class too, and then I’ll never get my degree?  It’s a scary thought process.
Or, woah, my heart is beating really fast.  What if I’m going to pass out?  What if I have a heart attack and then I die?  It’s a scary thought.
Anxiety and worry is scary.  Our thoughts go a million miles an hour and we can’t slow them down at first.
I used to have Generalized Anxiety Disorder.  I used to have to be on anti-anxiety medications.  I would have panic attacks, which are extremely scary, and every little thing would freak me out.  During a panic attack, I thought,  I’m having a heart attack and I’m going to die and that would make me freak out more.  Then I would finally calm down, but I would be so scared to have another one that I would panic about that, and it was a never ending cycle or so it seemed.
I learned how to do yoga and that helped me.  I learned how to do deep breathing exercises when I’m in places where whipping out my yoga mat wouldn’t be socially acceptable.  I learned how to cope.  I haven’t had a panic attack in about 4 years.  I used to have them at least once a week.
You have to train yourself.  You have to recognize the downward spiral of thoughts and challenge them.
Take my first example.  Failing an assignment because you can’t focus and then you’ll fail all of your assignments and then the class and then all classes.  Woah, woah, woah.  Slow down.  I have to tell myself that when my thoughts race.  Okay, so it’s one assignment.  When is is due?  Okay, not this minute.  So I’m not focusing well right now.  But it isn’t due today and I am going to take 20 minutes to calm down and relax and then I’ll try it again.  And if I fail this one assignment, that is not the end of the world, is it?  No.  So don’t worry, we’ll be okay.  And what is the worst that happens if I somehow do fail my class?  Is the world going to end?  Nope, it’s not.  Take today and do all the things that need to be done today, and don’t worry about tomorrow.
Do a little bit of your project today, and a little bit tomorrow, and keep moving forward.  But if your thoughts start to race, take a break, slow down, and challenge your thoughts.  Learn something that calms you down.  I learned yoga.  I learned deep breathing.  It might work for you, it might not.  Find something that works for you and do it.
And remember, there’s light even in the darkest places. :)